Tuesday 21 October
We got out of Southampton about 2pm to avoid the rush hour. Our plan was to drive home as quickly as possible as I had a showbiz party that evening and NME man had a Kaiser chiefs gig. (He's mates with the kaisers)
I hoped we'd be a bit flirtier after the power boat rush, but all we talked about was what was going on with our diaries that week, how he was going to write up the power boat article and a bit more about our backgrounds. I still didnt feel like we had any chemistry. No grippping things over the gear stick, no stroking legs, no sexually loaded conversation...
Highlight of the journey was stopping at Heston service station to buy sandwiches for lunch. I bought some newspapers too and read those (easier than making small talk)
He dropped me back at a tube near his house (we agreed that would be easier than him driving across London)
Then it was a dilemma - will there be a snog or a chaste 'bye'. In the end, I went for the middle ground. I gave him a quick peck on the lips (didnt want too embarrass myself). He just looked at me and said 'it was nice'.
For five whole minutes, I wanted to burst into tears. NME man didn't love me - I'm rubbish etc etc. It was only because I was standing up on the packed central line that I maintained my dignity.
Suddenly, I started feeling proud becausue I actually succeeded doing what I've wanted to do for the past few months. I'd had a night with nme man and I never dreamed that would have happened when my crush started.
I let myself into my house, threw my bags on the floor and sat on my sofa with some of the jelly babies I'd bought for the car journey.
As I chilled out wathcing the Paul O Grady 5pm chat show on Channel 4, revelling in my first ever sick day off work , my phone bleeped that I had a text message.
From NME man - saying 'thanks for a great weekend. We should do it again sometime. X'
KISS ALERT. KISS ALERT. KISS ALERT.
So what do I text back?